There's no way to sugarcoat it. Breaking up sucks. From the moment you hear your beloved utter the words, "I think we should just be friends," you're handed a ticket for an emotional roller coaster of anger-fueled highs and grief-stricken lows.
As the shock wears off and the sorrow sets in, you may find you don't know how to cope. While you have little choice but to ride out the storm, there are ways to manage those first dark days after a break-up.
Wallow. Cry, scream, write terrible love ballads. Explain to every friend that will listen that your now-ex will never find someone who appreciated him or her quite the way you did. Reread all those love letters. Give yourself permission to feel the pain deeply, to drown yourself in beer or ice cream, to purge yourself of the hurt. Allow yourself to grieve.
But Not for Too Long. Listen to that little inner voice that won't stop dwelling on the breakup and indulge it until you finally hear it say, "I don't care". That will be the night you finally stop sobbing long enough to fall asleep. When you wake up, you'll be a more rational person. Things will start getting easier.
Distract Yourself. You're still hurting, but you're getting tired of crying and you're worried you're wearing out your friends. But most dangerously, you find yourself tempted to dial your recent ex's number "just to talk". It's for these reasons that you need to find something to throw yourself into. Start an intense new project at work or pick up a new hobby you've wanted to try. In addition to taking your mind off your heartache, you'll also start feeling your bruised ego start healing.
Psyche Yourself Up. Once you've survived through the first -- and worst -- few days post-break-up, you'll be able to stop incessantly thinking about how miserable you are and can take the first small, stumbling steps toward moving on. Use this time to take stock of how you've changed, what you've learned and what you want from your next relationship. Armed with this knowledge you're one step closer to recovering and finding the right relationship for you.
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